Ripping a Yellow Pages in Half
The first time I ever saw someone rip a yellow page in half was at the age of 12 when my dad took me to see the movie “Jurassic Park”. The scene where they were tearing up the yellow pages was one of my favorite scenes from that film. Since then, it’s been one of those childhood memories that I’ve wanted to recreate with technology. So here it is!
In order to accomplish this feat, you’ll need two things: A computer and a printer. You could probably get away without the second item if you’re just trying to make copies of your own yellow pages or something similar. However, what would be even better than having both items is actually being able to print out multiple copies of the same page so that you have enough for all your friends and family members!
As far as computers go, there are many different types available. Some are very expensive while others will run off batteries and cost much less. For this project, I’m going to use a Windows 7 PC running Microsoft Office 2010 Home & Student Edition (the free version). If you don’t already have these programs installed, you may want to download them now before continuing.
Once you’ve downloaded the software, open it up and install it.
While you’re getting everything downloaded and installed, head on over to the website for your local phone book publisher (this could be Donlen, Dex, or even the White Pages). If you are in the United States, go ahead and enter your zip code into the search bar at the top of the page and then hit enter. This will bring up all the different phone books that are available for you to choose from. Chances are you don’t want just any phone book, you want the thickest one available (unless you’re making a bunch of copies, then you can get a couple of thin ones).
Be sure to select the correct one for your area.
With your computer and printer all ready to go, let’s get started!
Step 1: Click File, then Print. Next click on Selected Pages from the drop-down menu that appears. Then all you need to do is click your mouse on the first page of the document you want to print out and drag the small box over the last page of the document and release the mouse button. It should look like this when you’re done:
Step 2: Once you’ve got your pages all set, double check to make sure all the margins are correct and there is enough white space on the top and bottom (about an inch or so). Now you’re ready to print.
Step 3: Once your pages are printed out, you’ll notice that they are very thin and flimsy. This is because they are all single sided. If you want, you can take the time to turn all the pages over and reprint them so that you can have double sided pages. Or you can just tape them together like I do.
It’s up to you and will ultimately depend on how many pages you’re trying to rip in half!
Step 4: With all your pages printed and ready to go, you can finally get to work! Grab the first page of your phone book and rip it down the middle (down the center fold). You’ll need to do this for every other page if your phone book is extra thick. For instance, if your phone book has 800 pages, you’ll only need to rip pages 401-800.
Step 5: Once you’ve ripped all the pages you can, it’s time to start overlapping the individual pages and gluing them together to make full pages again. With 400 pages to work with your new phone book now has a total of 800 pages. This will work with any size phone book and will give you an even number of copies to make (two in this case).
And that’s it! You’ve now made yourself a nice doubled sided copy of the phone book. Now you can start calling all those companies and see if you can get them to take the ads out of your newly printed phone book!
If you’re looking for more tips and tricks on how to rip off companies, check out the link below:
Make sure to also check out the other tutorials we have on the site. There’s all kinds of good stuff in there for identity thieves of all skill levels!
Sources & references used in this article:
Muscular Christianity and the Spectacle of Conversion by MM Rose – 2001 – Macmillan
Soul Craving: An Invitation to the Feast That Satisfies by S Mazer – academia.edu
Magic and showmanship: A handbook for conjurers by J Warne – 2007 – books.google.com
The Order of Things by H Nelms – 2012 – books.google.com
ED JUBINVILLE–AMemorial by D Beer – The Quirks of Digital Culture, 2019 – emerald.com