Reasons Why You Should Be Using Kettlebells

Kettlebell Benefits:

1) They increase strength.

(Strength increases with age)

2) They improve balance and coordination.

(Balance improves with age)

3) They improve flexibility and mobility.

(Flexibility and Mobility improves with age.)

4) They decrease injury risk.

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(Injury Risk decreases with age.)

5) They enhance athletic performance.

(Athletic Performance enhances with age.

6) They enhance mental focus.

(Mental Focus enhances with age.)

7) They enhance physical fitness.

(Physical Fitness enhances with age.

8) They enhance aerobic endurance.

(Aerobic Endurance enhances with age.)

9) They enhance muscular endurance.

(Muscular Endurance enhances with age.

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10) They burn calories. (Calories are burned with age).

11) They reduce stress. (Stress decreases with age).

12) They help you sleep better. (Sleep better with age)

13) They provide a sense of accomplishment. (A sense of accomplishment is accomplished with age.)

14) They are fun and enjoyable. (Time passes faster when younger people do them).

15) They increase bone density. (Bone Density increases with age).

16) They increase lean muscle mass. (Lean Muscle Mass increases with age).

17) They prevent and treat osteoporosis. (Osteoporosis is prevented and treated with age).

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18) They can be used by all ages. (People of all ages can do them).

19) They can be used by people with various health conditions. (They can be used by people with various health conditions).

20) They can be used by people of varying fitness levels. (They can be used by people of varying fitness levels).

21) They increase your quality of life. (Your quality of life increases with age).

22) They make getting in shape easier. (Getting in shape is made easier when younger).

23) They make getting in shape fun. (Getting in shape is made fun when younger).

24) They prevent and treat overweight and obesity. (Overweight and obesity are prevented and treated with age).

25) They prevent osteoarthritis. (Osteoarthritis is prevented with age).

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26) They strengthen the lower back. (The lower back is strengthened as you get older).

27) They improve physical performance. (Performance improves when younger).

28) They improve the symptoms of depression. (Depression improves with age).

29) They improve the symptoms of diabetes. (Diabetes improves with age).

30) They improve the symptoms of fibromyalgia. (Fibromyalgia improves with age).

31) They help you feel good about yourself. (You feel good about yourself when younger).

32) They increase HDL cholesterol (“Good” cholesterol increases with age).

33) They increase confidence. (Confidence increases with age).

34) They increase vigor. (Vigor increases with age).

35) They increase strength. (Strength increases with age).

36) They improve the balance of muscle to fat distribution. (Muscle to fat distribution is improved with age).

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37) They improve the body’s use of oxygen. (The body’s use of oxygen is improved with age).

38) They improve the body’s use of calcium. (The body’s use of calcium is improved with age).

39) They can be done at any age. (They can be done by anybody at any age).

40) They increase self-esteem. (Self-esteem increases with age).

Mental and Social Health BENEFITS:

1) They reduce the symptoms of bipolar disorder.

(Bipolar disorder improves with age).

2) They reduce the symptoms of attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder.

(ADHD improves with age).

3) They reduce the symptoms of autism.

(Autism improves with age).

4) They improve self-esteem.

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(Self-esteem improves with age).

5) They improve cognitive function.

(Cognitive function improves with age).

6) They reduce the symptoms of anxiety and panic disorders.

(Anxiety and panic disorders improve with age).

7) They reduce the symptoms of schizophrenia.

(Schizophrenia improves with age).

8) They reduce the symptoms of Alzheimer’s disease.

(Alzheimer’s disease improves with age).

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9) They improve memory.

(Memory improves with age).

10) They increase the ability to focus. (The ability to focus increases with age).

11) They increase the ability to multi-task. (The ability to multi-task increases with age).

12) They increase the ability to visualize things. (The ability to visualize things increases with age).

13) They improve hand-eye coordination. (Hand-eye coordination improves with age).

14) They improve thought process and speech. (Thought process and speech improve with age).

15) They improve the ability to understand things. (The ability to understand things improves with age).

16) They improve the ability to find certain things funny. (The ability to find certain things funny improves with age).

17) They increase the ability to understand people from different cultures. (The ability to understand people from different cultures increases with age).

18) They improve the ability to put yourself in other’s shoes. (The ability to put yourself in other’s shoes improves with age).

19) They improve the ability to see things from different perspectives. (The ability to see things from different perspectives improves with age).

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20) They improve the ability to notice small details. (The ability to notice small details improves with age).

21) They improve the ability to picture things in your mind. (The ability to picture things in your mind improves with age).

22) They increase your memory retention. (Memory retention increases with age).

23) They increase your attention span. (Your attention span increases with age).

24) They improve your sense of direction. (Your sense of direction improves with age).

25) They improve your ability to make quick and logical decisions. (Your ability to make quick and logical decisions improves with age).

26) They improve your ability to make long-term goals. (Your ability to make long-term goals improves with age).

27) They improve your ability to judge the trustworthiness of others. (Your ability to judge the trustworthiness of others improves with age).

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28) They improve your ability to understand people. (Your ability to understand people improves with age).

29) They improve your ability to communicate with people. (Your ability to communicate with people improves with age).

30) They improve your ability to take things seriously. (Your ability to take things seriously improves with age).

31) They improve your ability to respect the beliefs of others. (Your ability to respect the beliefs of others improves with age).

32) They improve your ability to find happiness in small things. (Your ability to find happiness in small things improves with age).

33) They improve your ability to believe in something greater than yourself. (Your ability to believe in something greater than yourself improves with age).

34) They improve your ability to judge someone’s character. (Your ability to judge someone’s character improves with age).

35) They improve your ability to see through lies. (Your ability to see through lies improves with age).

36) They improve your self-confidence. (Your self-confidence increases with age).

37) They increase your level of intrinsic happiness. (Your level of happiness increases with age).

38) They increase the size of your vocabulary. (Your vocabulary increases with age).

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39) They improve your ability to defend yourself from physical harm. (Your ability to defend yourself from physical harm improves with age).

40) They increase your life span. (Your life span increases with age).

41) They increase the number of military strategies that you’re familiar with. (The number of military strategies that you know increases with age).

42) They increase your ability to lead troops into battle. (Your ability to lead troops into battle improves with age).

43) They improve your understanding of weapons technology. (Your understanding of weapons technology improves with age).

44) They improve your ability to wage war. (Your ability to wage war improves with age).

45) They improve your ability to form alliances. (Your ability to form alliances improves with age).

46) They increase your knowledge of military history. (Your knowledge of military history increases with age).

47) They increase your ability to recognize danger. (Your ability to recognize danger increases with age).

48) They increase your ability to recognize falsehood. (Your ability to recognize falsehood increases with age).

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49) They improve your understanding of tactics. (Your understanding of tactics improves with age).

50) They make you taller. (You’re a little shorter in height as a child).

What Virtues are those?

Uprightness (You have strong moral principles and are against anything immoral).

Glory (You long for fame and recognition of your deeds).

Curiosity (You are curious about the world around you and what lies beyond it).

Loyalty (You value the things closest to you and are true to them).

Boldness (You have no fear when confronted by danger).

Ingenuity (Your ability to think and find solutions to problems is extraordinary).

Self-Discipline (You are able to put away distractions and focus on the task at hand).

Acrobatics (You are incredibly nimble and agile in your movements).

Leadership (Others naturally turn to you for leadership).

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Empathy (You have a talent for understanding the feelings and emotions of others).

Chivalry (You adhere to a moral code of honor and chivalrous conduct).

Combat (You’ve been trained in the proper use of arms and armor).

What Flaws are those?

Extrovert (You love interacting with people).

Greed (You have acquired a want for material wealth).

Cowardice (You frequently act without thinking which commonly puts you in dangerous situations) .

Vanity (You are concerned about your own appearance and physique).

Gluttony (You have a want to eat frequently, whenever you can).

Lechery (You have a want for sexual fulfillment).

Wrath (You have the tendency to quick anger and short tempers).

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Sloth (You prefer to let others do the work and take the lead rather than provide any meaningful contribution yourself).

Envy (You are consumed with feelings of envy and jealousy).

Trickery (You have a tendency to lie and cheat in order to get your way).

What are your life goals?

Greatness (You wish to achieve greatness in all things you do).

Advancement (The desire for increased status and responsibility is overwhelming).

Spoils (You seek material wealth and riches, lots of it).

Conquest (Even though you seek to advance in the world, that doesn’t mean everyone should get to have nice things as you see it).

Knowledge (You seek to increase your own knowledge and the ignorance of others).

Discovery (The thrill of exploration and the unknown push you to ever-new heights).

What are your opinions on the following matters?


Ignore the lot of them and get things done yourself.

Gain more power in order to get more stuff for yourself.

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Give orders, but allow your underlings a large amount of freedom.

Imitate the system of Rask with a rigid class system.

Money & Class

Ignore it, personal freedom is more important than any amount of coin.

You desire to increase your own wealth and status even if it’s at the expense of others.

The rich and powerful should be rewarded for their efforts in bettering the world.

Classes should be preserved to ensure social order.

Add an additional city-state to the kingdom of Rask.

The Kingdom of Rask

Maintain the current borders, it’s good enough. Allow the borders to expand based on the whims of the people.

You desire to increase the size of the kingdom no matter the cost.

The other city-states in the area deserve to be part of your glorious kingdom.

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The other city-states in the area should be destroyed before they become a threat.

There needs to be more focus on defense against potential threats.

The Kingdom of Rask

Do nothing and maintain the status quo, there’s no point in changing something that isn’t broken.

Seek to better the lives of those within the kingdom, at least on paper.

Seek to bring glory to the kingdom through expansion and conquest.

Strive for freedom and democracy for the people, at any and all costs.

You wake up in your bed, and it takes you a while to remember the events of the previous day. You were at a tavern, drinking with your friends when you suddenly blacked out. When you woke up, you found yourself here in what appears to be a mansion. Standing up, you feel perfectly fine other than some slight head pain.

Taking a look around the room, you find that it’s larger and more luxurious than any bedroom you’ve ever seen before. There are two exits, one to a hallway and one that appears to lead outside. Hearing noises outside your door, you choose to investigate where they come from.

Opening the door leads you down a long hallway with several other doors which are no doubt bedrooms like your own. Down the hall you see a woman in servant’s clothing with her back towards you talking to someone you can’t see.

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“Come on Karth, they’re already on their way over.” The servant says as she stops and seemingly waits for something.

“Good, I can’t wait to try this meat. Last time it took longer than expected and the cook was in no mood to prepare something else.” You hear a second voice respond coming from just around the corner.

“By the Emperor, you’re always thinking about your stomach.” The servant scolds before turning to walk down the hall.

Not wanting to be caught so unprepared, you quickly look for somewhere to hide. There’s no where to really conceal yourself in your room, but there is a small cabinet underneath the bed that you could probably fit in.

» Continue « You think as you quickly climb under the bed and close the doors.

No sooner have you closed the doors when you see the servant woman walking down the hall towards your room. She enters and immediately notices that your bed is empty.

“He’s not in here.” The woman calls out down the hall, probably to the other man. There’s a pause for a moment before the other man responds.

“Check the rooms to make sure then meet me in the stables, I’ll be waiting for him there.” You hear the man order before quickly walking away.

The servant woman sighs before calling out to you. “Kid, if you’re in there then you might as well come on out now. We’ve already checked all the other rooms and there’s nowhere to run.” You don’t respond and instead wait in silence for her to leave. A few minutes pass before you hear her footsteps leave the room and the door close behind her.

With the woman no longer in the room, you get out of your hiding spot and start to explore your surroundings. The first thing that you notice is large book on a stand near the bed. Walking over to it, you find that it’s titled “The Glory Of The Empire.” Opening it up, you see that it’s mostly pictures with a few paragraphs on certain events in the Empire’s long history.

You close the book and begin to look around the room some more. You find that there are a number of interesting knickknacks in the room, from statues to paintings and even small models. The only thing that seems out of place is a clear box on top of a small dresser. The box has several small holes on the top and when you look inside you see a large spiders crawling around inside it, almost as if it’s some kind of spider nest. Curious, you pick up the box and take a closer look at it.

The spiders don’t seem to notice you at all.

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Not wanting to look at the box any longer, you look at the door next. It’s wooden with a gold design carved into it. Raising your had you find that it’s locked of course. You try the handle a few times but it’s definitely locked and you don’t have the key for it anyway.

Spurred on by your curiosity, you begin to search around the room some more. After looking under the furniture and inside some of the drawers you still can’t find anything else that seems even slightly interesting.

After a time you begin to get bored. You’re trapped in a room with nothing to do, no one to talk to. You wish that would hurry up and either let you out or just get it over with so this torture would end.

Taking one last look around the room you go back to looking at the door. It’s not the kind of door you’ve seen in the fortress, it’s made of better wood and the carvings on it are very intricate. It’s a shame that it’s locked.

It is a shame isn’t it?”

A voice says causing you to jump in surprise.

You turn around and see a ghostly figure standing next to the bed. The figure takes a while before he speaks again. “Do not be afraid of me child, it is merely me, Count Grey. I have been watching you since you entered this room and I must say, your curiosity has served you well. Others who have come before you could not solve the riddle of my door and were thus never released from their prison.”

W-what do you mean?”

You stammer. “

How can you keep people in here if the door is locked?”

Count Grey looks at you and cocks his head to the side before speaking again. “You would not believe me if I told you.”

“Try me.” You say standing your ground.

“Very well young one, if you wish to hear the truth. This room is not like the others in this manor. It is not a part of this manor. It travels through time as well as space and locks people in depending on their fate. I am merely the keeper of this place, watching over it until my services are no longer necessary.”

You don’t know what to make of his claims. If this is some kind of trick, it’s a very elaborate one and one that you won’t fall for. “

And what fate do I have?”

Count Grey looks at you and smiles, or at least you think he’s smiling, it’s hard to tell with the lack of facial expressions that ghosts have. “You child, are not meant to be part of this world any longer. Your fate is to die here, in this room.” With those words he turns and walks over to the wardrobe on the opposite side of the room.

“No! Please! This isn’t right! You’re a ghost, you can’t hurt me!” You begin to yell as you back away from him.

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Count Grey stops walking and turns his head slightly so he can look at you through one eye. “And you’re a human, yet I’ve already hurt you. Think on that as you rot away in here.” With those words he walks into the wardrobe and disappears from your view. The door of the wardrobe then opens all the way and you can see that inside it is nothing but darkness.

The room begins to shake even harder than it was before. You try to keep your footing but it’s almost impossible. Everything in the room goes flying in different directions, even the furniture. The wardrobe, which was closed when Count Grey went inside of it, is now open and empty.

The shaking gets worse until you see the wall that the bed was against start to move. It’s turning into a door, like the wardrobe!

You have no idea where it leads but anywhere has to be better than here. You don’t want to die and if that ghost is telling the truth, that’s exactly what will happen if you stay here.

You don’t even think, you just act on pure instinct and run for the moving wall. You make it just in time before the wall closes completely, cutting off your exit and leaving you trapped in the darkness.


You call out hoping that maybe the ghost didn’t leave you after all.

You receive no answer back and realize that you’re in complete and utter darkness. “Oh god! I’m going to die here.” You whimper as you feel fresh tears roll down your face.

The sound of stone grinding against stone grabs your attention and the wall in front of you begins to open. You don’t have to wait long before the opening gets big enough for you to see beyond it.

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You see a beautiful forest just outside. The sun is shining and there isn’t a single cloud in the sky. You see birds flittering about from tree to tree and little woodland critters scampering around.

This is too much for you and you fall to your knees in amazement. When you glance back into the room you just came from, your jaw nearly drops.

Count Grey stands in the middle of the room. He looks exactly like how you saw him in your dreams. “Hello Allison. That’s not my proper name, but you may call me by it if you wish.”

What is this place?

Am I…am

I dead?

Please tell me I’m not dead.”

“No, you’re not dead. This is my home, or rather it was. Now it’s yours. Welcome to Everglen.”


You ask in an almost inaudible tone.

“Yes, that’s what I called this world.

It’s much different from your world, but then whoever said that dreams were suppose to make sense?

Now come on, there are some people who wish to meet you. They’ve been waiting a long time for this moment. Just close your eyes, think of the world you saw when you arrived here and think of nothing else. You’ll be fine.”

But, what about you? Who are you?”

“Just a ghost from the past my dear. Just a ghost from the past. Now go, let your adventure begin. It was my honor serving with you.”

You have no reason to disbelieve him and much reason to believe him. You close your eyes and think of the forest world. In an instant, you’re there and standing just outside the invisible barrier.


A voice says behind you.

You turn around to see a beautiful girl with long black hair and green eyes. She’s dressed in leather armor and is carrying a short sword by her side.

Dad? Is that you?

But you’re…” You can’t even complete the sentence.

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Yeah, I was dead but then I woke up and it turns out I wasn’t dead after all. I’m guessing something similar has happened to you.”

You smile and embrace your father. After a moment you realize you’re both crying tears of joy.

I don’t understand, how did this happen?”

You ask.

“I don’t either, but we have time and questions for the people who did this.”

You look up see a dark skinned man with long black hair and a headband dressed in something similar to the man in your dreams. Your heart nearly leaps out of your chest and you draw your sword. In that instant, you know that this man is the reason you’re here.


What have you done? Where’s my father?”

You ask with a threatening tone. Your father puts his hand on your shoulder to calm you.

“I did this, but I did it for him as much as I did it for you. The Empire is falling and it’s going to take the both of you to set things right. I brought you here to give the both of you a chance to survive what’s to come.”

What are you talking about? What’s going to come?”

“I’m talking about the Eternal Dominion, a great war is upon us and when it’s done it will be the dawn of a new age. I’m not exactly sure when it will be, perhaps a few decades, perhaps a few centuries but it will come. It is our duty to make sure the right side wins.”

Eternal Dominion?

I’ve never heard of it.” You say.

“Exactly, that’s what we have to change. We have to make sure our side wins, not just for ourselves, but for everyone. I know you’re tired and you have a lot of questions, and I promise you we will have time to talk, but right now you both need to rest and prepare yourselves for the great war that is to come. I have to go and prepare as well, but know this was done for the best intentions. I love you both.”

With those last words, the dark skinned man turns around and walks away. You’re both left standing in an unfamiliar forest wondering what the hell just happened.

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“Well, I guess we better follow before he gets too far. Come on, we can discuss things as we walk.

You and your father follow the man through the forest, through winding paths and to a small clearing where you can see tents erected and a campfire blazing. You see various people milling about the camp and going about their own business. Some of them look human, some of them look like something else, you’re not quite sure what though.

We’ve been walking for days, how have you guys managed to set up a whole camp without us knowing?”

Your father asks.

“Magic of course! We’re wizards, and well this is a whole camp of wizards.

You think setting up a small spell to hide a whole camp is hard?

This entire camp is invisible to any who wander near it, you should know that better than anyone.” The man jokes. You and your father are lead into one of the tents where you are meet by an older man with a long white beard and a bald head who is sitting behind a desk.

“Welcome back Vamp, I see you’ve brought some guests.

New members?”

The man asks.

“I don’t think so Warrick, the boy is still too young and his father certainly isn’t a member yet.” Vamp says.

Then why are they here?”

Warrick asks getting slightly irritated.

Vamp turns to you and your dad. “You’re here because we need new members, and more importantly we need new Eternals.”

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Your Dad seems taken back by this statement. “

New Eternals? But how?

Eternals have been gone for centuries, there can’t be any left!”

“True, but it just so happens that your son is a direct descendant of the original Eternal line.” Vamp says to him.

Warrick turns to you and studies you for a moment before nodding. “I see the resemblance now, yes he could very well be an Eternal born again.”

Born again?”

You ask clearly confused by all this.

Vamp and Warrick both nod as if this all makes perfect sense, which for them it probably does, given that they’re wizards. Your Dad on the other hand is still a bit confused, which in all honestly, you find a little comforting.

“OK, I’m going to have to have Vamp explain this all to me too because I’m lost already.” Your Dad says.

Vamp and Warrick both take a seat before getting into it, you and your Dad do likewise.

“Firstly, let me introduce myself, my name is Vamp. I’m sure your son’s told you about some of the strange things that have happened to him lately. His body producing chalk, his wounds healing quickly, his strength and speed surpassing any human.” Vamp begins to say.

“He has, but I thought it was just his imagination.

Is it true?”

“In a manner of speaking, yes. Your son is what is known as an Eternal, the only one in existence nowadays, however there used to be many of them during ancient times. Eternals were creations of the old Empire, living weapons bred for war. They were augmented with the strong and fast breed to be superior warriors and nothing more. Most of them were killed or wiped out centuries ago, along with the Empire they served. Your son is a brand new Eternal, one born instead of made, and with none of the psychotic problems they possessed either. You were chosen because you’re his father to begin the process of creating a new Eternal. His bloodline comes from an ancient pure human stock, with strong genes, which is why he was chosen. He has potential to be one of the greatest heroes ever known.”

Remembering back to what happened in the mine, you think that might be true. “

So, I’m a freak then?”

“Not at all, you’re just new.” Warrick says.

“We need to discuss some things, if you’re both in agreement, you and your son can join us. It will be difficult as there will be training both mental and physical. Your son will have to learn to use his powers and truly become an Eternal and serve the order in the name of the Emperor. He’ll also need to learn the history of the Empire, the Emperor and his purpose. It’s vital that he knows and understands it all as it is part of his heritage and birthright.

If he accepts these terms then he will become an apprentice and function as a full member of the order. This means that he will be sworn to certain rules, but it also means that he will have advantages and privileges beyond those of normal citizens. He will also be allowed to use his powers freely as befitting of his status.

Are you willing to accept this term?

Remember that as an Eternal, your son will be required to serve the order and the Emperor. Can I also remind you that he is still merely a child and may not even become a full Eternal, let alone follow in your footsteps.”

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Do we have a choice?”

You interrupt.

“You can walk away from this right now, if you like. But if you stay, you are obligated to serve the order and by extension the Emperor.” Vamp replies.

Mom looks nervously at you, before turning to Warrick and asking. “

What does he mean by terms?”

“He means that your son will have to undergo some tests to truly see if he is fit to become an Eternal and serve the Emperor to the best of his abilities. These could be simple or they could be highly dangerous. Naturally, he will be required to pass these tests in order for him to join as a full member.”

“I see.

And if he fails?”

“Then he will not become a full member, and will have to rejoin as a mercenary. However, if he fails significantly, we may have to… Release him.”

What do you mean?”

“We may have to kill him.” Warrick says bluntly.



You’re going to kill my son over some tests?”

Mom exclaims in shock.

“The tests are not just for judging his skill, but also his mental fortitude. We cannot have someone become an Eternal who will break under pressure or is too weak willed to accept his new role. If we make this exception for your son and he fails… Badly, it could be destructive for the order as a whole.

Better he dies now than bringing the eye of suspicion upon us. The odds of him failing are low, but it is a possibility, which is why we have this rule. Now you must decide if you want your son to take the chance.”

You look at Warrick’s face and see no emotion. He could be ordering another man to be killed and he’d sound the same. You’re not sure about all this, but one thing’s for sure, you can’t let your son die because of some stupid tests.

“I’ll do it.

What are these tests?”

“Alright, come with me and we’ll get you set up, the test will be starting soon. You as well, Tarna.”

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Your mother looks like she’s about to speak, but stops herself from doing so. Looking down in sadness, she follows Warrick as he walks away. You turn to follow, when you feel a hand grabbing your arm.

“You came back…” Fay says with a smile. “I can’t believe it…

You came back to me.”

“I had to. I’m not going to make the same mistake again. I want to be with you.” You say, meaning every word.

It’s going to be different now right?”

“Yes, it’s going to be better than it’s ever been. Now come on, let’s go, I don’t want to keep the Eternal leader waiting.

Fay grins and follows you.

You catch up with Warrick and the others, walking alongside him in silence for a while.

You’ve never been here before have you?”

Vamp asks. You shake your head. “Even when you were brought here as a child to be judged, they obviously didn’t bring you through here. This is the only way to the room of judgement though, it’s very special and highly sacred to us.”

He looks around for a moment as if collecting his thoughts, and then continues. “This corridor doesn’t appear on any map, even the ones given to government officials. It’s also enchanted so that none of our kind would accidentally stumble upon it. Those rooms,” He points to a set of huge wooden doors each with a pair of torches on each side, emitting a faint smoke. “Are for those who have been brought down here to judge their worthiness of being an Eternal.

The person’s name is written on a piece of paper, and then put through that fire. The smoke will change colors, depending on the will of the gods whether they live or die. It is the most sacred place in the entire base, even more than the large corridor where we hold meetings and train.”

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The group stops in front of a normal looking door with no distinguishing features whatsoever. Warrick turns to you.

“Well, this is it. This is where your journey begins. Remember, only you can save yourself. Please, put aside any feelings of guilt or pity. It is not a time for emotion, it is a time for action.

I wish you the best of luck, and whatever happens, know that you will always have a place with us.

Now, are you ready?”

You nod. “I was born ready. Let’s do this.”

Warrick smiles. “Very well.” He opens the door and ushers you inside.

Before you stands a older man in a robe with a staff on one side of him, and an empty chair on the other. There is also a small set of stairs going down, and a torch on each side of the stairwell. The man looks at you, but speaks to Warrick.

You have brought me another one, Warrick?

I thought you were the last one.”

“I was, Elder Cestrum. This one has potential, I believe.”

The Elder nods, and turns to you. “You there! Come forward and sit in the chair. We shall see if the gods will you to become one of us, a warrior of the night that will protect all of our kind from danger.”

You walk forward, and sit in the chair at the bottom of the stairs. The Elder stands behind you, and begins to speak. “The gods are not always kind. Sometimes they show favor toward those who deserve it, but most of the time they enjoy testing us, seeing how much we are willing to suffer before we break. However, we are not weak.

We will not break. A warrior of the night is never broken. A warrior of the night is never defeated… except by the gods themselves. However, such a being does not exist, and therefore this test is only the test of a mere mortal. Thus, if you are a mortal, you shall fail this test, and die. If you are a warrior of the night, the gods will favor you, and you shall pass.

Are you ready?”

You nod your head. “I am.” You say, feeling rather unsure of yourself.

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The Elder Cestrum slams his staff into the ground. “Then may the best man win. Success, or death.”

Suddenly, the torches on the wall are blown out, leaving you in total darkness. You feel a rush of air by your ear, and that is the only warning you have before you hear an explosion behind you. The sound of splintering wood assaults your ears, as well, as you realize that something has destroyed the chair you were sitting in… with you in it.

The Elder lets out a cackle as he speaks. “Too impatient, boy! A warrior of the night knows patience!”

Doesn’t this entire test just consist of tests of patience?

You think to yourself as you scramble out of a pile of broken wood. You hear his staff hit the ground, followed by his voice. “Too slow! A warrior of the night is quick! You will not pass the test! I will have to dispose of…”

He pauses, as if to let the suspense build.


As he says this, a small orb of light appears in his hand, illuminating his creepy face. He looks at you with pity in his eyes, but also rage. “I am sorry, monster. I did not want to see you become one of my kind. You could have been one of the best.

Now you shall die. I will not make it painful. This is my kindness that I bestow upon you. Now, die!” As he says this, he lobs the orb of light at you.

You try to get out of the way, but he’s moving too fast and the orb is small. It hits your chest, and you instantly feel pain. It spreads throughout your body, but it isn’t your body that’s taking damage. It’s your soul. You feel it burn and sizzle as it’s being destroyed by the light.

“Do not worry, monster.

Sources & references used in this article:

Kettlebell training by S Cotter – 2013 –

Kettlebells for Dummies by S Lurie – 2010 –

Kettlebell Workouts For Beginners: Essential Kettlebell Exercises to Build Strong Muscles and Have a Healthy Body by P Keithley – 2015 –

Effects of weightlifting vs. kettlebell training on vertical jump, strength, and body composition by WH Otto III, JW Coburn, LE Brown… – The Journal of …, 2012 –

Kettlebells: Strength Training for Power & Grace by S Vatel, VD Gray – 2005 –

The Russian kettlebell challenge: Xtreme fitness for hard living comrades by P Tsatsouline – 2001 –